Before and after

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I am so proud of the professional writers..the intellectuals the ones who have spell check and went to college. You get noticed on wordpress. I’m happy for you. While you were studying I was ditching school. I could not pay attention in class. I was too stressed to study. Too messed up in the head dealing with my mother a schizophrenic bipolar single mom. I don’t repeat her illness so you can feel sorry for me. No. I tell you this so that someone  out there who is suffering with suicidal thoughts takes notice that I know what suffering is. I know what it is to feel ashamed. When others hide mental illness and hide it I expose it. I don’t dwell on it because I’m over it. But since   everyone is talking about it why not me. When I cried and tried to vent in the 80s..I was told to respect my mom. Like my stories were far fetched and made up. Now everyone and their momma is venting why? Because there are more books on mental illness..and its the new thing?? Once a book is written on a subject its like ooh ahh! Let’s join the book club! I tell you what. I’m not interested in the delayed books, too late.  I’m not going to do it. I’ve survived. I’m tough. I’ve had many fall backs but I’m like the terminator.. I will be back..I can write a book on mental illness because I’ve done All the research.  My mother doesn’t have many years left. She has bleeding ulcers due to her medication, diabetes and a whole bunch of other stuff…you take a pill for depression and the side effect is suicidal thoughts. Now what the hades is that?

I am thankful for medicine.. She is nourishing me now. She acts normal. I guess its never too late to make amends and peace. Too bad it didn’t happen in 30s. I am who I am because of her. Hardworking, indendent, non racist and humorous. The timing is so off though. She is sicker due to the medicine and I am more confident.. Life isn’t fair. It sucks rocks..but if I can do it so can you ..I may not get that many likes on my WordPress tonight cause my grammer is off. So what. As long as I have my Mark Anthony CD and my tequila for my flu who cares.

Oh I’m supposed to be talking about hair. I did a color retouch, wetset, on this new client who found me on Google…my cell is about to die. Back to party time in my Lil car👍😂

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